Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Mad at herself....

In the latest issue of "O Magazine", Oprah takes issue with....herself for gaining weight...gaining weight that she had lost - several times over.

Well, honey, join the group - a big group, no pun intended.

Lots of us have been there and back and there again. And my advice to you, O, stop beating yourself up - you're a beautiful, powerful, intelligent leader. But somehow to women, being all of that is not enough, we MUST be thin.

My story:
I lost weight after my divorce. It seems that every night my husband went out I would lose my sorrows in a huge bowl of spaghetti and butter. He went out several times a week and my already overweight body ballooned. For years I was at my healthy weight. I dated (lots) and finally found someone that I loved and was to be married. He died. Over the last twenty years, I've gained half of that originally lost weight back.
Oprah, I'm a professional who's "made" something of herself. I'm a writer who's been published frequently. I've raised a good, intelligent, loving daughter. I'm a self-sufficient, caring woman of 61. I have friends who love me.
BUT, I am overweight - obese, like you, on the BMI scale. So, somehow, all of the things I've accomplished mean nothing.
I struggle with that identity everyday.
I struggle with that lack of self esteem everyday.

At least I know I'm in very good company.

I will try to adopt your attitude - not to long to be thin, but to work to be "healthy and strong."


Anonymous Lisa said...

Hi Mitzi...reading your entry made me realize all women struggle with weight issues. I am forever on a diet,ever since I was 5. After awhile it seems so useless and tiring. But coming from a family that put so much emphasis on physical beauty it's hard to have that courage to actually be totally comfortable with myself. Actually, right now, I have gained some weight back after going on yet another crazy diet and find it difficult to even see my parents and family for fear of being singled out as "fat". It is now the holidays and everyone seems to be with family and friends but for me it's a different story. And as ridiculous as this may seem for an independent, otherwise healthy person that I am, it can be a little lonely to have to struggle with these issues without your loved ones because in actuality, this pressure comes from them, and of course, our society and culture.
I have heard so many times to my face"oh, you got FAT!"People can be so cruel! And this kills me a little inside although I act like I'm ok with it. When anything negative happened in life, I immediately began HATING myself and blaming the weight. I even based my whole social schedule on whether I was thin enough or not.
It's hard to maintain good self-esteem but I decided I want to only be healthy, not skinny from starvation! If others cannot deal with it maybe those were unhealthy relationships and people to be around after all. So here's to being healthy and HAPPY!

5:15 PM  
Blogger Mitz said...

Rarely does anyone say to a thin person, "You're so skinny!"

Lisa, carry yourself with dignity. I would tell those "You got FAT!" people,that you're happy and healthy.

It's time we should love each other for what's on the inside - not the outside. And gaining back lost weight is not a failure - it happens to almost everyone who loses weight.

Blessings and have a wonderful holiday.

6:02 PM  

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