Sunday, April 20, 2008

How Did I DO It?

I passed by a couple of my old neighborhoods recently. I was on streets that lead to the local hospital - the one where I received by nursing education and where I started my nursing career.

I lived near the hospital so I could walk to work. I didn't drive and couldn't really afford a car - even when I got married, I walked to the hospital - in all weather and for almost a year in nursing clinics (shoes) with holes in them. When Heather was small I worked the evening shift so I only needed a babysitter for an hour or so in the afternoon before her father came home from work- I walked to and from the hospital - about six blocks one way - even after my shift ended at 11 PM - sometimes I wouldn't get out until later. The work as a charge nurse was difficult, but I did it. It was hard work, but I did it - for years.

During the day, because I had no car, there were only a few places I could walk to - with Heather in a stroller. There were few stores nearby, so for the most part, I was home until I walked the long six blocks to work.

My life during that those years was mother and nurse - I don't have a memory of doing anything for myself - anything that I wanted to do - even if it didn't cost money. I was a mother and a nurse.

Sometimes I wonder if I even had a thought about myself in my head. I have no memory of anything except wanting to go back to school - which I couldn't do then because I worked evenings.

Maybe that's why I'm so selfish now and wonder how I did it then.


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